To Live and To Learn......

I wonder and I ponder and I imagine and I weep and I laugh and I feel and I seek and I find and I discover and I dance and I dream and I pray and I hide and I seek and I remember and I forget and I live and I learn and I loathe and I love.

And I sit

By Myself

A lot.

It amuses me to watch people pass by me. In wonder. Why is she sitting by herself? What does she find so interesting that she is reading so intently? What is it that she is writing that stirs so much passion? And just why…..is she sitting by herself? Then you always have the few, often older gentlemen or ladies, who feel the need to come up and start a conversation. Maybe feeling sorry for me : ) Maybe just curious. Tonight I didn’t mind. Tonight I welcomed it.

She was elderly. Maybe Eighty. Cane in hand to steady her rambling gait. Slow. She was walking so slow. Slow enough that I could catch her eye. Face covered with age spots. Teeth absent. Mouth puckered. Slow. Walking so slow.

I smiled and I wondered. Of the stories. Oh the stories you could tell me. Oh the wisdom you could share. Strangely hoping she would stop to talk. She did…….

“What is it that you are reading so busily?”

Looking down at the pages and wondering how to describe this book that I am reading “so busily”. Wondering how one actually reads busily. “It’s a book about mindfulness. A book about leaning to be more intentional about living”

She looked blankly as if she wanted to contribute, but she didn’t really understand. I was searching….not wanting her to walk away.

“A book about learning how not to worry”

“Ohhhhh, Well, honey, ya know, we never do. We never really do.” She smiled and I smiled and she shuffled away. Slowly. A short beautiful exchange it was.

And I thought. What has life taught you, dear woman? What, sweet lady, have you learned in this world you have lived in? What stories could you tell?

You see there is this concept that I fear we all miss so often. Myself included. It is a gem of a concept. A jewel of a lesson. It is simple but ferociously difficult.

It is Living and Learning.

Living is inevitable - until we Die. Learning is something that we must choose to do from what Life places before us. Yes, the lessons are ever before us. Almost each minute of each day. As tiny golden flakes of wind that we either recognize and breath in or…………..not. But they are there. Floating by. Slowly. But we, as we live “so busily,” miss them. And so life repeats itself and we find ourselves at the same table reading the same book in the same relationship or having the same fight or feeling the same feelings. Looking in the mirror at the same person fighting the same fears in the same battles.

Walking in the same way with the same shuffle, holding on to the same cane - to steady our rambling gait : )

I am at this moment outside on the patio of my favorite restaurant in my favorite close-to-home getaway. Looking inside the window pane at the couple underneath the candles placed on the wall as they drink their glasses of white wine The are in intent conversation, and I wonder and I ponder and I imagine……He cleans his glasses and holds them up to the light of the candles on the wall to see if they are free of spots. Puts them in his pocket and takes her hand. They lean in. Faces close and he kisses her. She smiles.

Life. It is a blessed thing indeed. Love. It is remarkably magical. Learning to Love well and to Live well through the daily journey of the walk. Allowing God to teach us each day from that Life which He has given us:

Terribly Priceless.

Lord, As this day comes to an end and I sit beneath this blinding moon of full to overflowing - it matches my heart..... and I want to thank you. Surrounded by the beauty of your world. Immersed in your presence. I ask you to teach me. Open my eyes to the golden wind swirling around me of lessons waiting to be learned and understanding waiting to be revealed. If I had one thing to learn from this life, Father - one thing indeed - it would be to learn to Love Well. Knowing I have such a long way to go, yet thankful for this Life of Lessons. Anticipating Learning. I am

Yours, b